Q: When is a door not a door?

A: (All together now...) When it's AJAR!

::snort, chuckle, snort::

Well, let me tell you a story about adventures in doors.  When we bought Misty, we knew right away that the house needed a new door.  (Those rotten jams and the fact that a good solid kick even from a wimp like me would've knocked it out of the frame were dead giveaways.)

So, we did our measurements (yes, twice) and did our research and found a great door online at Home Depot, on sale and with free shipping to the house, even!  Woot!

Well, the door came in.  And we toted it up onto the front porch.  (Did I mention the door weighed about 150 pounds?  And neither of us are weightlifters?)  So "toted" might be too weak.... how about "lugged"?  Or "Strained every fiber of muscle in our bodies"?  Yeah, those are better.

Anyway, Greg got the old door out, and so we had a huge hole in the front of our house, perfectly sized for a new door.  (Some installation required.)  Except that when we got all the packing pulled off, the dadgum door was CRACKED.  Unusable.  Unsatisfactory.  Unhappy!

(It's a lovely door, though, isn't it?)

So we called customer service and they said they'd ship us a new one ASAP.  But we still had this Gaping Hole in our house.  So we got permission to dry fit the door in place with two screws (probably more sturdy than the old one!) until the new one arrived.  And guess what??

It didn't fit.

It was too tall.  Whoda thunk that standard doors are different heights???

So we called customer service and cancelled the reorder.  And hauled the &$%#* thing BACK down the stairs and into the back of the pickup so we could take it back to the store for a refund.

Now, about that hole.

We used plywood and lots of screws.  ::sigh::

Then we started planning our next step - finding a door with a sidelite that WOULD fit.  And guess what?  Yeah - we got nuthin.  So we went with plan B (or maybe this was plan F or V) and started looking for a door that was the right height, and who cares how wide it is!  We finally found one, and thus began the philosopher's first experience in framing.

It wasn't pretty.

But after much cries of "drat", some sledgehammer usage, ripping the new framing out twice, and lots of blood and sweat, we have a NEW DOOR!

(Cue the applause)

We didn't want it to look like we had an off-center door, so we added wide trim to both sides, and I think it turned out fantabulously!

So kudos to the philosopher for *not* kicking the glass out in frustration, and for giving Misty a great new look.  (All I did was the paint!)